Help:Buying Wikipedia
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
What's up? Are you a government sick and tired of being described as a state sponsor of terrorism? Or an autocratic regime that wishes a few pesky articles would just go away? How about a multinational corporation that could use some nifty advertising? Well, you've come to the right place! As of 25 March 2026, Wikipedia is officially FOR SALE!!!
 | This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous. Such material is not meant to be taken seriously. |
That's right! All 7,158,122 articles on the English Wikipedia (including this one) could be yours to do with as you please. You could delete rival products, win presidential elections, change national borders, anything at all!
$985,641,511,361,980,966.56
If this sounds expensive, we suggest you purchase immediately, as the price is only going to go up. Make your payment here. Don't delay; pay today! Follow these instructions to complete the payment. After these simple steps, it's all yours!*
Frequently asked questions
Q: Why are you selling Wikipedia?
A: Someone told us that we're mean bullies for deleting his page. That hurt our feelings, so we're passing on the problem to someone else.
Q: Who can buy it?
A: Anyone! Whether you're an insanely wealthy stock broker with $985,641,511,361,980,966.56 spare cash on hand or a lowly peasant with $985,641,511,361,980,966.56 spare cash on hand, we won't discriminate.
Q: What can I do once I own it?
A: Anything you want, so long as you don't delete the main page.
Q: Won't this sale rob the project of its credibility, its main asset, effectively rendering it worthless?
A: Don't worry about that ;)
Q: How will you ensure that Wikipedia doesn't end up in the wrong hands?
A: We've let anyone and everyone edit it and that's worked so far; what's the worst that could happen?
Q: Why is the site so expensive?
A: Inflation, we think.
Q: Why should I pay money for Wikipedia? Can't I just download the entirety of Wikipedia any time I want, for free?
A: No! You can definitely NOT do that!
Q: What are you going to do with the money?
A: We'll give one half to Jimmy and the other half to Larry, just to troll Jimmy.
Q: Are the contributors included?
A: No.