Kum (godfather)

Historically, in the traditional culture of Ukraine a number of rituals have existed to celebrate the bonds between people from different families. During the Green holidays women in Ukraine would engage in the tradition known as кумування (literally - "kuma-becoming"), during which a kerchief and coral jewelry would be given to a potential kuma. In Polesia girls would give each other birch wreaths and yellow-painted eggs, kissing and wishing for themselves to become kumas in the future. Godparents for one's child were usually chosen from among in-laws, people respected in the community or simply those with whom the family was befriended.^[7]

According to ethnographer Pavlo Chubynskyi, after a child was born, its father would visit the man he had chosen to be his kum with bread and salt, and take the host's bread in exchange. The same ritual was repeated when choosing the kuma. According to Ivan Ohienko, it was not allowed to refuse such a proposal. In the region of Kholm there was a special ritual where a man who had become kum for the first time would be put on a sledge covered with hay and driven from his house to the house of his parents with great honour. Many Ukrainian proverbs and sayings are dedicated to friendly relations between a person and their kum or kuma. After baptism, kum and kuma would serve as the child's "second parents". However, if the child died, its godparents would lose their status, and in this case the traditional way of finding kum and kuma for a new child was to ask the first person met on the way.^[8]

In modern Russian language the terms kum and kuma do not always signify godparents of one's child, but can be used in respect to close friends of the family or best man and best maid during a wedding. In Russia until the 15th century there was a tradition of taking only one godparent for a child, but nowadays it is common to have two godparents - mother and father. They must belong to the same church as the family of the baptized child; it is not allowed for godparents to be each other's husband and wife. According to church law, biological parents cannot serve as their own child's godparents.

Kum and kuma played an important role in bringing up their godchild, would be invited to all family celebrations and received special attention. On the day of Saint Emilian (21 January) it was common to invite one's kum and kuma for a visit, during which they would present the hosts with soap and a towel, which had protect their godchild from evil eye and illness, after which a feast would be organized. Many Russian proverbs and songs are dedicated to the relations with kum and kuma. They are also mentioned in literary works by Nikolai Gogol, Alexander Pushkin, Leo Tolstoy, Nikolay Leskov, Ivan Bunin and other classics of Russian literature.^[9]

• Sandek