User talk:Bobby Cohn

 Courtesy link: Draft:Schleicher & Sons Piano Company

I'm looking for help. I don't understand the policy or how it applies to your draft. But first:

1) I fixed the whole ancestry citation, and I completely took it out. Looking back, it wasn't really necessary anyways (wrong?) 2) I fixed the whole "It was probably the case for the three other factories" thing and edited it, and I'd love to know what I can do to make it better - also, I don't know what "missing citations" mean. I did use the same link three separate time, but I don't understand how that it is wrong (please help).

I'm not asking to help me find better sources, I just want to ask you, how can I make it better in a very practical way. I'll read the sources you left for me (how can i make a better draft, etc), but I'd love to know your thoughts. Out of ten, how would you rate it so I know how much I should change?

Thank you so much for your time. I don't know if I worded this message wrongly, but I'm not mad or anything, I just want to know. Thanks again:) William20120 (talk) 21:28, 15 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi @William20120, no offense taken, I'm always more than happy to help. I've combed through your citations to get a better sense of the source material and writing, and I've done some extensive cleanup of the citations in the process. You can see the difference using the citation style templates that I used, but feel free to let me know if you have any questions. With regard to reusing named references, I've done the cleanup there, but there is a detailed walk-through in this user essay. Specifically, for some of the problems I'm noticing:

• I've tagged "The piano company would grow to four factories" with ^{[failed verification]} as the advertisement used for the sourcing there only verifies three of the locations.
• I've removed the phrasing "The following information came from the Mount Vernon newspaper The Chronicle, detailing a visit from one of their reporter, particularly how things ran in the Mount Vernon factory" because that narrative type of in text attribution is not required, and the citation was placed inline at the end of the requisite text for that section.
• I cannot establish within the sources a lot of the narrative from § History. For example, I don't see support for Gustav Schleicher's youth in Germany or his background, I don't see specifically it mentioned about Steinway & Sons in the apprenticeship.

This last problem in particular goes for a lot of the article. I'm seeing a lot of things written that are not supported by the citations. It looks like you yourself have added ^{[citation needed]} to a lot of the writing. Where then did you get this information? Everything on Wikipedia must be sourced. Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 14:23, 16 July 2026 (UTC)

-The article of "visit to the schleicher and sons factory" from the Chronicle says in the beginning that he served a techical apprenticship

-Birth and marriage records of some of Gustav's father and grandfather and great grandfather have them listed as "Schreinermeisters", or mater carpenters - - I can provide you with sources.

-I saw what you did with the sources - yes, I think that is better than what I did.

-One place where I put [citation needed] is where it says that the company went bankrupt in 1914. I saw a newspaper clipping that proved this but I can't find it anywhere. I know this isn't acceptable, but I did see in the "Stamford Advocate" article that it does indeed say that it went bankrupt in 1914, but that's pretty much it.

-The information that say a factory was in Ossining was from my grandfather, and yes, I can'y find sources to back it up. I'll remove that part

-What else do you need me to change? I really want this published, and I'll delete anything that needs to be removed to do so. William20120 (talk) 14:54, 16 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi @William20120, what everything boils down to is that we have to follow the sources, personal information (see WP:BACKWARD, it mentions writing using oral research from family) or original research and inferring information won't work:

• "techical apprenticship" ≠ "recruited by Steinway and Sons" If the source doesn't say it, then neither can we
• Newspaper clippings are okay as a source provided you have all the information, whole newspaper articles would be best; we don't actually care about having things online. What we do need if it is an offline source is as much information as possible, ideally you could fill in all of the relevant citation template parameters

  {{cite news |last1= Author's last name |first1= Author's first name |date= Byline date |title= Article title |work= Newspaper name |location= Publication location |publisher= Publishing company }}
  

Everything that isn't supported by a citation would either need to be cited (the Stamford Advocate would work if you still have it, for example) or removed. That is most of the advice of WP:BACKWARD. If you do that, I think we'd have a better picture of what the final acceptable article would look like and I would give some thoughts on WP:Notability and publication.

Hope that helps, Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 18:14, 16 July 2026 (UTC)

There was already a draft of that article at Draft:The War Trilogy. Although there were some minor differences, they were by the same editor, so the one you reviewed would technically be a Duplicate. Also, the editor had removed my previous decline notice. Commandant Quacks-a-lot (talk) 15:52, 17 July 2026 (UTC)

Ah, I see now that you've dealt with that. Thanks! Commandant Quacks-a-lot (talk) 15:57, 17 July 2026 (UTC)

Yeah, I noticed that after my declination. I thought the age range wasn't a disambiguator but part of the name, otherwise I would've caught it before the move. I've since consolidated the draft declinations, and redirected the duplicate submissions. I've left a warning on the user's talk page. We'll see what sticks. Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 15:57, 17 July 2026 (UTC)

 Courtesy link: Draft:Paul Hallahan

Hi Bobby,

Thank you for the welcome message and for pointing out the guidelines regarding conflict of interest. I completely understand the policy and appreciate the guidance.

Since I have already written the text, would it be possible for you to copy or move the contents of the article to my user sandbox (User:HalHal43/sandbox)? I would like to save the text so that I can look into having an independent, third-party editor review and properly format it in the future according to Wikipedia's notability guidelines.

Cheers for for your help,

Paul HalHal43 (talk) 20:38, 20 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi @HalHal43, I can make that move for you, but I want to know if you understand what you're asking or what you've done thus far? The draft was submitted by you, with presumably the intention to be reviewed? It currently says at the top of it "Review waiting, please be patient." That will be done by an "independent, third-party editor review". Can I ask, have you used an AI chatbot or large language model (like ChatGPT or Claude) to edit or discuss this content? Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 20:42, 20 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi Bobby,

Ok I misunderstood your last message, I the thought it was being deleted as I could not build a page of my own, even with good links etc. Which I get. Ok if it is being reviewed I will leave it and wait and see. I have used a LLM to format the text I wrote. Is this also an issue? HalHal43 (talk) 20:54, 20 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi @HalHal43. not a problem. You can view and continue to work on your draft which is located at Draft:Paul Hallahan. In the future, yes, please do not rely on LLMs to write for you, we'd rather review your own work than LLMs which have a tendency to incorporate errors, and we'd rather discuss directly with you, regardless of formatting or style, so we know we have a better understanding of each other.

Happy editing! Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 20:59, 20 July 2026 (UTC)

Yeah I get that. I will get back to editing the text and thanks for letting me know.

Have a good one,

P HalHal43 (talk) 21:03, 20 July 2026 (UTC)

I believe I have submitted the revised version but I suspect you have read the first draft that hasn't been revised. Also I have made quite a few inline citations, as per your suggestion, but you said I did not have those! Biblioshay (talk) 23:41, 22 July 2026 (UTC)

@Biblioshay: I see some citations in the draft but the section Draft:Seamus Anthony Cooney § Education is entirely void of references, what you do have of inline citations serve mostly as explanatory footnotes, whole paragraphs go uncited, and there are {{citation needed}} tags that remain unaddressed. " an on-line bookstore he owned and worked after retirement. The bookstore specializes in first-edition and hard to find books and prints" is not an adequate citation. Similarly, neither is " The library was named after Notre Dames's President Emeritus Rev. Theodore M. Hesburgh, C.S.C. This Memorial Library is a centerpiece of Notre Dame’s intellectual pursuits : it serves as the flagship building of the Hesburgh Libraries system. In 2009, the library was ranked 61st largest collection among research universities in the United States."

Please review Help:Referencing for beginners and Help:Your first article.

No, I did not see your question, would you direct me to it? Also, I do not see that you have edited the article since my declination. Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 23:50, 22 July 2026 (UTC)

Hi @Biblioshay, let's maybe start with something more simple. Where did you find or get all the information you based your writing on? Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 23:53, 22 July 2026 (UTC)

From you comment above, I am sure you haven't seen my revised version. I have completely deleted information about the on-line bookstore and about Notre Dame library being a flagship, etc. How do I correctly submit the revised draft. Maybe I just was not on the right place where I can submit the improved draft? (FYI, for my improved draft, I have included scholarly articles that published Cooney's works an also referenced the books he edited, etc.) Biblioshay (talk) 00:12, 23 July 2026 (UTC)

@Biblioshay: okay, yup, looking at your contributions Special:Contributions/Biblioshay, I can see you have written your draft on your userpage. Your userpage should be used instead to tell others about yourself. Here is what mine looks like: User:Bobby Cohn. Would you like me to place it in your sandbox? You can then copy and paste over what you have written into the draft at Draft:Seamus Anthony Cooney and continue to revise that? That’s probably what is causing your confusion and why you cannot see the resubmit button. Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 00:18, 23 July 2026 (UTC)

Thanks for your reply. Yes, if you can put my revised draft in the sandbox for me, that would be great. I guess I will submit the improved draft from there! All I will correct the info on my user page! Biblioshay (talk) 00:30, 23 July 2026 (UTC)

 Done. Feel free to user your userpage located at User:Biblioshay to tell other users about yourself, or declare any connections or conflicts of interest you may have. You can also tell other users about your interests or hobbies. The other version of your work has been preserved at User:Biblioshay/sandbox. Feel free to use your sandbox to practice any other types of editng you have. You can move over select contents into Draft:Seamus Anthony Cooney and when you feel you have adequately added citations, resubmit by using the blue button on that page.

With regard to citations, I do want to stress you should review Help:Referencing for beginners and Help:Your first article. A lot of your citations are inadequate and need expanding or improving. You should be able to specify things like article or book title, author, URL if applicable, published year. Narative style citations are not of much use. Primary citations will only work for certain types of facts, otherwise we need independent and secondary sources.

Do you have any connection to the subject of the draft article? Bobby Cohn 🍁 (talk) 00:41, 23 July 2026 (UTC)